The Darkness in Me Read online

  I sense my brother before I even see him, he knows he is not allowed down here. There is always a draw to the darkness, that even he can’t resist. I can’t say I have the same draw to the light. We are two complete opposites, or so they say. My brother has darkness in him, nobody knows just how much, but the darkness recognizes its own. It always has and always will.

  “You know you are not allowed in these parts brother.” I say to the darkness.

  “You know I don’t give a fuck what the laws dictate.” He says back to me from where the darkness hides him. “Are the rumors true, have you found her?”

  “Yes, it will end soon before it even gets a chance to start.”

  “Why have you not just ended it already? Why wait and risk her disappearing again?” Dax asks me from the shadows that still conceal him.

  At this I stop walking. I don’t know why I just didn’t end it right there in the house. Instead I brought the house back, I protected her from those men, I watched the darkness protect her, I fucking just watched and did nothing. I don’t need to know how this plays out, I could have just ended it, it would be over already. Fuck.

  I hear the shadows start whispering. They are normally loud and want to be heard, after all I’m the only one that can hear them. I listen to their whispering, they are making no sense, they just keep babbling crap to themselves, until I catch a word they keep repeating.

  Ours.

  “What!” I shout at the darkness. “What the fuck are you going on about?”

  They go quiet. Fuckers.

  “Not good news then?” My brother says as he comes out of the darkness and comes to stand in front of me.

  It’s like looking in a mirror with him, with a lighter shade of hair and our green eyes, he is my twin. If people don’t know us that well, they would never tell the difference between us. Even the eye colour, the shades are similar, mine is just darker.

  “After fucking eons with them now they decide to be quiet. Its driving me fucking insane why they just don’t say what the fuck is going on.” I say to my twin. “I need you to do me a favor.”

  “Anything, what do you need?”

  “I need you to go see Tray for me.” I say to Dax. He knows what it means if I’ve sent him to Tray. He won’t say a thing until I’ve confirmed what I think is going on. God, the fates can’t be such bitches as to do this.

  With that, he disappears back in the darkness. The cheering is becoming louder now as I round the corner and enter the ring. Tonight, is not a good night for these fuckers. The thought of what happened in the house making me angrier.

  I see Weyland in the far corner of the ring, waiting for me to arrive. On the other side of the ring are the three that challenged me. They look smug as fuck in that corner, they think tonight is their night. It’s not. I walk over to Weyland, and give him a short nod, I’m not even going to bother to change out of my suit I’m wearing, this won’t take long.

  I throw Weyland my suit jacket and start to roll my sleeves making my death ruin tattoos visible to these fuckers. I nod again to Weyland, let’s get this show on the road, and the cheering intensifies, they think they have a chance.

  Three against one, I’m glad to see these fuckers getting along with each other. If they just worked together in the first place, they would most likely not be here. The first one approaches at a speed. Moving in and out of my line of reach, thinking he can use it against me. I wait, I don’t move, that’s the fucked-up thing, I assess, I learn and then I kill. This fucker doesn’t know a thing about me, but in these few seconds I have learned enough about him.

  Before he can even process what is happening, I move with him, using the same path he used, but faster. I grab onto his neck and slam him to the floor of the ring. The cheering has stopped, they know they have lost this round now. I lift the fucker that challenged me, squeezing ever so slightly, just enough to limit his intake of air.

  I bring him up close to my face and I whisper into his ear, “Did you really think you would win?” I don’t let him reply, I don’t allow him to take another breath, he will choke to death, a fucking reminder to all those who are watching not to mess with me.

  I watch the life leave his body, a waste of the power he held, but could not wield it, I’ll make good use of it. For his punishment, like all the others before him, I won’t allow them to find peace. They are here for one reason and one reason only, and that is to be punished. I stab my hand through his chest and grip hold of his heart. With a slight tug I rip his heart from his chest and throw it to the floor, that’s not what I’m after. I call to his soul, his power and take hold of it. I feel the power he had, it is now mine, it bends and combines with my own power. Instead of feeling more, more power, more fucking peace, I feel fucking sunshine again.

  ~Natalie~

  No, not again. I don’t want to watch this again. I know what is going to happen, I’ve seen it countless times before, I don’t need to watch as he rips apart another person. My body moves on its own, its drawn to the scene every time. I can’t escape, it needs me to watch.

  It’s in the same place as all the other times, its wet and dark, only this time it’s quiet. There is no cheering, only the sound of the dripping water falling onto the floor. I try to stop moving, if there is cheering, I at least know what to expect, but this quietness, is not normal.

  I round the corner to see its already over, the horror has already taken place. I look around the room, its empty, except for the man in the center of the room, holding some sort of person in his one hand and blood dripping from the other. I look to the floor and see a small object laying there in a pool of blood. What the hell just happened here?

  I look around the place again, it’s all in darkness, I can’t make out where I am. I look back to the man in the center of the room and move towards him. I know this is a dream, it must be. I fell asleep in my bed, I know I did. As I get closer to the man, I realize it’s the same man I always dream about. His eyes are closed, and he is breathing heavily. He almost looks at peace right now. But I know the reality is he is not, you don’t go ripping out what I now know is a heart if you are at peace.

  I look towards the man that is hanging from the man’s hand, I take in his lifeless eyes staring at this man in horror. What the hell did he do to deserve this fate. I honestly hope I never find out. I hope these dreams stay as they are, dreams. I take another step towards the man that haunts my dreams, there is nothing else in the room besides the two men, I’m obviously meant to go towards him.

  I take another step towards him when he opens his eyes suddenly and I freeze. I can’t move, I can’t breathe with the way he is looking at me. He looks so angry that I’m interrupting whatever the hell was going on here, but he can’t see me, right? I decide now is my time to go, my little adventure is over, instead of moving towards him, I’m back tracking, hopefully I don’t make a sound.

  Before I can take a step back, he has me, I didn’t even see him move. The sound of the man’s dead body hitting the floor can only be heard after he has one of his hand around my throat. I feel the blood dripping off his hand onto me, I try to squirm away, try to break his hold. But his grip is solid, I grab hold of his hand that is around my throat and try to pry it off my neck, but I come away with just blood on my hands. His grip is like a vice around my neck. I dig my nails into his hand, into his arm trying to pry my neck away, he won’t budge, the scratches I leave behind don’t deter him in the least.

  I want to scream, but I can’t, his hold is too tight, it’s just enough for me to get a little air in my lungs, but even then, I’m battling. I pull my eyes away from his hands and look into the eyes of the monster that has his hold on me. But I don’t see the eyes of a monster, I see beautiful green eyes, or maybe it is the lack of oxygen that I think they are beautiful.

  The monster pulls me closer to him, so close that I can smell him, feel his breathe on my face. His smell alone does something to my brain, or again maybe it is the lack of oxygen, he smells li
ke smoke and spice and sin.

  “Now little one, what are you doing here?” He says to me, his voice so soft I can barely make out what he is saying.

  “How, how can you see me, this is not even real.” I barely say back to him. His hand around my throat is not giving me much space to talk or breathe.

  “I assure you little one, this is very real, and I can see you just fine.” He whispers back into my ear.

  “How, how is this possible?” Disbelief clear in my voice.

  “Can’t you hear that?” He asks me. “Listen.” He says again, completely ignoring my question.

  I stop moving, stop struggling to get out of his grasp, and try to listen to whatever the hell he is talking about. Except I hear nothing, not even the water dripping from the roof. I look back at him, about to say that I couldn’t hear anything, but before I get the chance, he speaks again to me, except he is angry this time.

  “The steady fucking beating, the constant fucking knowledge you are close.” He says out loud. He pulls me in closer to whisper again in my ear, “The steady fucking beating of our hearts.”

  I don’t know what to say back to him, I start to struggle against his grasp again, but his grip has tightened, this just might be the way I die, in my dreams. I watch as he looks down at his hand and smiles, the most beautiful haunting smile that would haunt anyone’s dreams.

  I watch as he wipes his bloody thumb over my lips. “You would look good covered in blood little one.” He whispers to me and loosens his grip a little. “I look forward to the little dance we have going on. The little game I’m playing with your life. I could kill you here, now, and watch the life leave your eyes, but what fun would that be?” He taunts me.

  I want to cry, I want to scream, but I know it would be pointless. I don’t know what to do, or what to say, I know this can’t end well for me.

  “Just let me go!” I manage to say out loud to him. It’s pointless I know.

  “No, you are mine, I will never let you go now. The game just got more interesting and my dirty little secret just got out.”

  “What secret, nothing is different from all the other times. I’ve seen you kill plenty of people before in my dreams.”

  “Except this time is no dream little one. Take a good fucking look around you.” He barks out at me.

  I take a good look this time, his grip has loosened some more and I’m able to turn my neck. I still see darkness, but then it starts to lift slightly at first, then it disappears into nothing. I wish it would have just stayed where it was. Behind the darkness are hundreds of men, all staring right at me. I take them all in, some look smug and some look confused but most look downright evil. Fuck!

  My grip tightens around his arm, like I’m afraid he will leave me to deal with these men myself. I would rather stick with the one devil I know than to take on a horde of them that I don’t know. I know he will kill me, at least not now, but these men, they look starved. Most of their eyes travelling the length of my body, others have an evil glint to theirs and I don’t want to be the main attraction.

  “You see, little one, now I’m going to have to kill them all, they all have seen what I’ve been hiding all these years.” He whispers in my ear. “Now go back, I’m coming for you soon little one.”

  With that he lets me go and I can feel myself getting pulled away by some unknown force and then I’m gone. The last thing I heard was.

  “Kill them all.”

  ~ ~ ~

  I wake with a start, I look around the room I’m in and realize it’s my old bedroom. My head is spinning from all the alcohol I drank just to get me too sleep. I can only hope the alcohol brought on the dream, but I know that is wishful thinking. I know I was back there again, I know what happened.

  I check my neck for any blood that was left from his hand. Nothing is there, my neck doesn’t hurt as it should from being held like that. I remember the conversation we had, the way he smelled, the way he spoke. I’m his dirty little secret. But I can’t remember him. He said he is coming for me, that I am his.

  I belong to no one!

  I jump out of bed to check the salt lines I drew around my room for extra protection, and for an all else fails situation, I drew some around my bed. They are still there, undisturbed. So how did he get to me in my dream. He never has before. Or maybe he has, and I just could never remember that he did.

  I go to check out the window, it’s still dark outside, there is not a star in the sky. Its oddly dark, I can’t even make out shapes of trees or cars, nothing. Odd. I open the window to get a better look, and realize the ground is moving, its flowing to and fro. The fog. The fog has moved from that dam house and moved over the town.

  The shadows are oddly quiet about this fog, I’m not sure what to make of that. They have a comment for everything. I look over my shoulder as if they would be standing there like an old friend. My room is covered in darkness, if they are here, they are not making themselves known.

  “What do you make of this?” I ask out loud, hopefully the shadows will hear me.

  “Change.” They whisper back.

  “Change?” I ask them back. But it’s gone quiet again, I guess that’s all they had to say about it.

  I look back down to the fog, what kind of change is it doing? I see it’s trying to climb up the side of the house. I quickly close the window, hopefully its sealed and this fog can’t make its way inside.

  “Sleep, we will watch over you.” I hear the shadows whisper from somewhere in the darkness.

  I know I won’t sleep now, knowing that he is coming for me, and that is dam fog is trying to break in. But before I can help myself, my eyes are closing and I’m moving towards my bed. Before my head even hits the pillow, I’m asleep.

  Chapter Five

  “I wake up to find its empty, you are gone. I start to wonder if you were even there to begin with.” - Natalie

  ~Natalie~

  Waking up was not a good idea. I wish I could have just slept last night away, mostly because of the raging hangover after drinking so much. I need to find an alternative, and soon. I know I need to get up, it’s the funeral today, I haven’t spoken to my parents about it much, even though I left and didn’t look back, that I will always regret, my parent stayed in touch with everyone. I’m not sure what to say to them.

  I don’t remember anything after I started drinking last night, and for some reason I feel like I have a gap in my memory. Something important happened, and I can’t quite put my finger on it. The more I think about it, the more my headache hurts. I think it’s best to leave the thinking until after my hangover has gone.

  I drag my feet to the shower, I definitely need to freshen up before I face my parents. After I have showered and put myself together, I get dressed for the funeral. I know my mother is going to be upset and I need to be there for her when I wasn’t before.

  I walk down the stairs, still a bit unsteady on my feet, but I recover fast from hangovers, after some food I should be fit to function properly. I get to the bottom on the stairs and get hit with the smell of bacon frying and the sound of laughter coming from the kitchen. Odd.

  I walk into the kitchen to see my parents cooking up and storm and having cheerful banter with each other. My father is the one to see me first, his smile fades as he realizes I clearly have a monster hangover.

  “At least I now know who got into the liquor cabinet.” He says jokingly to my mother.

  “Oh honey, are you still battling to sleep, you should really try something herbal or at least something healthier.” My mother comes over to me with a concerned look on her face.

  “I’ve tried everything mom, so far this is what seems to be working for me.” I say a little too short to my mother. I feel guilty before I can even finish my sentence.

  My mother, bless her soul, decides to ignore my little comment and just pats me on the back.

  “Don’t worry, I’m sure after you have had some breakfast you will feel better.” My mother says to me. �
��Ben, is the breakfast nearly ready, clearly we have a hungry customer.”

  I sit at the breakfast table and I can’t seem to put this morning together. I feel like I’ve missed something important.

  “Honey, why are you dressed like that?” My mother asks me, which pulls me from my confused thoughts.

  “For the funeral?” I look at my mother, confusion written all over my face. I have definitely missed something.

  “Oh, whose funeral honey? I’m so sorry, I didn’t know.” She says to me sympathetically.

  Now I’m dumb struck, and I think my jaw has unhinges itself. I’m not sure what to say to her now. Did she develop some amnesia overnight to deal with this or what? I don’t want to seem insensitive, but I’m at a loss for words.

  “The funeral I came home for, don’t you remember?”

  “Well honey, you come home every day, so I’m sorry I didn’t remember, you just never mentioned it.”

  “What you mean, I come home every day. You make it sound like I live at home or something.” I argue. My head is pounding, something isn’t right here.

  Now that got my mother’s attention. She is looking at me like I’m completely crazy and even my father has turned around to look at me. Did I miss something, did they miss something, what the hell is going on?

  “Well I don’t know where else you think you live sweetheart. Are you sure you ok, how much did you drink last night, I know you battle to sleep but I think this might be affecting your memory? Maybe you should try one of your remedies again you sell at the store, maybe they will work this time.”

  “What store?” I ask my mother, “I’m sorry, but I’m just not following what’s going on here.”

  “The one you started up a few years ago. The people around here love your stuff, little do they know about your special little gifts.” My mother hints at me jokingly.

  “My store?” I ask. I always wanted my own little store when I was younger. But after I ran for my life that kind of went out of the window along with many other dreams of mine.